Several months ago, in the 2018 Goal setting newsletter, I suggested being focused and selective with your time. Lately, I was wondering what you focus on and pay the most attention to these days.
What do you listen to the most?
- Talk radio
- TV
- Movies / Videos
- Music
- Friends talking
- Other
Second question: is the message primarily
- Positive, negative or neutral
- Optimistic or pessimistic
- Encouraging or discouraging
- Educational or nonsensical
Your answers are important because how you feel daily is being shaped by what you listen to. What you focus on will increase in your life and be reflected in your attitude and actions.
The research on the importance of focus is deep and compelling.
Both Bill Gates and Warren Buffett, when asked what single factor most contributed to their success, said Focus.
Timothy Ferriss said, “Being selective—doing less—is the path of the productive. Focus on the important few and ignore the rest.”
An Unknown author said, “The successful man is the average man, focused.”
On an everyday level, the easiest way to mistakenly cut your finger while working in the kitchen is to focus on (look at) your finger more than the food you are cutting. Smashing a finger when hammering a nail happens most when you focus your eyes on your finger rather than the nail.
Returning to my first question, the correct answer to what you listen to the most is – for everyone – your thoughts. It’s what you say to yourself in your head – your self-talk. Yes, you talk to yourself, all day, every day, probably way more than you know.
Don’t be concerned that you talk to yourself, or even that you answer yourself, we all do. Be very concerned about what you say to yourself! It is slowly, silently and powerfully shaping your attitudes and actions.
Now that you know you listen most to your thoughts, how will you answer the second question – what is the primary tone of that message?
I’ve often thought it would be cool to connect my brain to a printer, and print every thought I say to myself for one day. Crazy, I know, but the results would be very telling.
If you recorded all your self-talk for one day, printed it out and then highlighted all the positive thoughts in green, the negative thoughts in red, and the neutral thoughts in gray, what color would dominate your document? Are you sure?
In his book The Power Of Story, world-renowned performance psychologist, Dr. Jim Loehr states, “I believe that stories – again, not the ones people tell us but the ones we tell ourselves – determine nothing less than our personal and professional destinies. And the most important story you will ever tell about yourself is the story you tell TO yourself.”
The truth is you are your biggest advocate or your worst enemy. You see, everything starts with a thought.
The good news is that no matter what thoughts you currently communicate to yourself, you can change them. They are only thoughts, and changing your thoughts is under your control.
Loving yourself is one of the most positive changes you can make, and impacts many other areas of your life. Louise Hay suggested the following: “The first step to loving yourself more is to stop criticizing yourself.”
Make a conscious effort to pay more attention to your self-talk. When you find yourself saying something negative, pessimistic or critical
- stop dead in your tracks and hear what you just said to yourself
- record or remember it so you can examine why you said it
- change the message to align with how you want your life to be
In changing that thought to a positive, optimistic message, you are taking the first step in changing your reality. You can do it; anyone can do it when you focus on it!
That’s my perspective, what’s yours? Leave us a comment or a question below this post, and don’t miss the video on this topic on YouTube!
P.S. In Three Weeks: 6 Steps To Designing Great Interview Answers!
You made some fine points there. I did a search on the theme and found a good number of people will go along with with your blog.
http://www.supremesearch.net
Hey Alton, thanks for your comment and I’m glad you found value in the post. Have a great 2020!
Aw, this was an extremely nice post. Finding the time and actual effort to generate a good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate a whole lot and never manage to get anything done.
http://www.koreabiomed.com/news/articleView.html?idxno=1938
Hey Sandy, procrastinating is so 2019. It’s now 2020 and I know you’ll find a way to get past the procrastination – if you want to badly enough. Wishing you much success with that and all you aspire to be and do. C
Hi Craig;
I liked your post. Very true. An offering or suggestion : you might offer techniques for transitioning one’s thoughts to be more positive. Maybe your resources do this as well. Looks helpful!
Thanks, Candace. Actually, a follow-up post that examines in more detail how you transition your thoughts to be more positive is in the works. Stay tuned!